Thursday, April 24, 2008

Breaking News...

Contrapositive to the common adage that children should be seen and not heard, many folk on the internet should be heard and not seen. In fact, most of them shouldn't be heard either.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Directions

"Karma had a sense of justice that her younger sister Serendipity lacked."

So begins a piece I was working on. Isn't that deep? Hemingway I believe once said something like: Write without symbols. Make a man a man and a tree a tree. Write them well and let people draw out their own symbols. They'll surprise you.

I on the other hand, appear to enjoy applying blunt force trauma directly to the skulls of innocent readers with the handy dandy Mallet o' Symbolism™. I at least subconsciously realized this when naming this blog "Plot Device". It was my up front admission of being a hack. If it's not short and gimmicky, I probably didn't write it. I'm trying to decide where to go from here. Should I continue with the gimmickry? Should I write a bit more subtly and plainly, hoping in the process to improve my writing skills towards the literary? Should I turn more towards the expository with essays on my thoughts? Or should I just totally sell out whatever "values" I had in my writing and do pure comedy here regardless of whatever cheap tricks I pull?

These questions of course take far too seriously something which should be handled with levity. I will write what comes out and try not to overanalyze. Sometimes a blog really is just a blog. I think Freud said that.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

universe.createInstance()

#include <physical_laws>
#include "constants.h"
#include "cosmic_events.h"

void* universe;

int main(int argc, char** argv)
{
//given our time slicing, this may need to be a custom bit length
long int current_instant = 0;

register_callback(BIG_BANG, argv);

while (COSMOLOGICAL_CONSTANT > -1 && COSMOLOGICAL_CONSTANT <>
{
//probably needs high end system -> hard realtime constraints
render_particles();

current_instant += 1;
recalculate_cosmological_constant(); //haha "constant"
}

if (COSMOLOGICAL_CONSTANT <= -1)
{
register_callback(BIG_CRUNCH);
return -1;
}
else
{
return COSMOLOGICAL_CONSTANT;
}
}

render_particles()
{
foreach (boson b in universe)
{
if (b.observed)
{
b.setToParticle();
}
if (b.dimensional_radix > 4)
{
b.hide();
}
b.render();
}
}

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Somewhat Damaged...


Alternate title: "Oh hai! I fiksed yor ipod!"